Week 3: What Matters Most to Me?
Why Understanding Your Values Makes Every Decision Easier
One of the hardest parts about figuring out what's next isn't a lack of ideas.
It's having too many.
Maybe you've started thinking about taking a class, starting a business, volunteering, traveling more, writing, creating, changing careers, or finally making time for yourself.
None of those ideas are wrong.
The challenge is knowing which ones actually fit the life you want to build.
That's where your values become incredibly helpful.
This week isn't about creating a list of impressive words.
It's about understanding what genuinely matters to you so future decisions become clearer.
Why Values Matter
Most of us make decisions based on circumstances.
Our schedules.
Our obligations.
Our finances.
Other people's expectations.
Our habits.
Those things matter.
But if they're the only things guiding your decisions, it's easy to wake up years later wondering why your life doesn't feel like your own.
Values act like a compass.
They don't tell you exactly where to go.
They simply help you recognize which direction feels right.
What Are Core Values?
Core values are the principles that shape the way you want to live.
They influence how you spend your time.
How you define success.
What gives your life meaning.
The kinds of relationships you build.
The work you enjoy.
The way you want people to remember you.
They're less about goals and more about identity.
For one woman, adventure may be a core value.
For another, stability.
For someone else, creativity, learning, family, service, faith, independence, generosity, curiosity, or freedom.
None are better than another.
They're simply different.
Signs You're Living Outside Your Values
Many women begin feeling restless because their daily lives no longer reflect what matters most.
You may notice:
Feeling successful but unfulfilled
Constantly saying yes when you want to say no
Feeling disconnected from yourself
Spending time on things that don't energize you
Wondering why you're busy but not excited
Often, nothing is "wrong."
Your life has simply drifted away from your priorities.
Questions to Explore This Week
Instead of trying to identify your values immediately, start with your experiences.
Ask yourself:
When have I felt most alive?
When have I felt proud of myself?
What moments have given me the deepest sense of peace?
Who do I admire, and why?
What qualities do I hope people remember about me?
When have I felt completely authentic?
What kinds of people make me feel at home?
What do I want more of during the next decade?
Patterns will begin to appear.
Values Make Decisions Simpler
Imagine you're deciding between two opportunities.
One pays more.
One gives you flexibility.
If freedom is one of your deepest values, the answer becomes much easier.
If contribution is your highest value, you might choose differently.
If family is your priority, you'll evaluate both options through an entirely different lens.
Values don't remove difficult decisions.
They simply make them less confusing.
Your Values Can Change
What mattered at twenty-five probably isn't identical to what matters now.
That's normal.
Life changes us.
Parenthood changes us.
Careers change us.
Loss changes us.
Success changes us.
Midlife often brings a new perspective because we're no longer trying to become who everyone expects us to be.
We're becoming more ourselves.
This Week's Invitation
As you work through this week's reflection guide, don't worry about choosing the perfect words.
Instead, pay attention to what keeps showing up.
The moments that make you smile.
The stories you keep telling.
The qualities you admire.
The experiences you want more of.
Your next chapter doesn't have to look like anyone else's.
It simply needs to reflect what matters most to you.
Reflection Questions
What moments have made me feel most fulfilled?
What qualities do I admire most in other people?
What do I want my life to stand for?
Where does my calendar reflect my priorities, and where doesn't it?
What do I want more of over the next five years?
If I built my next chapter around my values instead of other people's expectations, what might change?
